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Heels by the Trampoline

We went to my parents’ home for a quick visit the other day. Within minutes of arriving, my littlest love asked earnestly whether we could go to a nearby park in the neighbourhood to jump on the trampoline. When I told her that I didn’t think it was a good idea she got visibly upset and retorted her famous phrase, “Because why not?”

“Look at what you’re wearing!” I replied. “You didn’t come prepared to go out in the park.”

Clearly my littlest love thought that I was being difficult. I begged to differ.

You see, she wasn’t wearing ordinary clothes. She was donning one of her favourite princess dresses. And as if that wasn’t enough, she was wearing a pair of kids’ high heel shoes that were about four sizes too big for her. I hadn’t bothered to make her change before leaving the house because we were just popping over to my parents’ home briefly. A visit to the park wasn’t in the plans. Not in my plans, at least.

“Mummy, please!” she continued, and then her bottom lip made a convincing appearance. She begged with such gusto that my heart melted for this littlest love who had been relegated to playing indoors for far too long.

“Just for a little bit.” I conceded. She pranced around in excitement and we headed out the door.

When we got to the trampoline, she took off her shoes, I lifted her up and in, and she began to jump.

Boy, did she jump! I watched on in amazement as this pint sized love defied gravity and bounced higher and higher with each leap. The sheer joy on her face was contagious and I felt my heart expanding as she soared freely with wind in her hair and a hearty laugh on her lips.

My gaze shifted to the edge of the trampoline. Perched ever so gracefully at the entrance of the trampoline were her oversized heels. I couldn’t help but smile. I again looked at my littlest love and was captivated by her bountiful curls rising and falling while her elegant princess gown all but swallowed her up with her vigorous movements.

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In that moment, I was so happy that she didn’t take ‘no’ for an answer.

In that moment, I felt proud that she insisted that she was ready to jump, even if I asserted otherwise.

In that moment, I vowed never to tell her that she wasn’t ready ever again.

I thought of the very many times that I have told myself that I wasn’t prepared for something. That I somehow needed to show up differently in order to be ready. That the shoes that I sought to fill were far too oversized for my fearful feet.

I thought of the false messages of mass conformity that we have been fed.
Messages that tell us we must show up in a certain way in order to have access to the things we want to achieve.
Messages that tell us that we need to change first before we can take a leap.
Messages that tell us that we can be ourselves…as long as we fit in.

Watching my love jump confidently without any regard for the perceived limitations that I tried to place on her was awe-inspiring. She showed up. Just as she was. And she jumped to her little heart’s content.

And now I know that that’s exactly what I want.

I want to refuse to listen to that critic within – even if it insists that I must change before I can take a leap.

I want to jump with confidence in my ability and in my capacity to grow – even if the shoes that I seek to fill appear to be many sizes too big.

I want to show up. Fully. Authentically. And vibrantly – even if, in so doing, I feel ill prepared or less than enough.

As we walked back to my parents’ home, I noticed my love stride with authority. I again smiled, this time full of gratitude that even though her shoes were far too big for her, she had somehow inspired me to walk in her footsteps.

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Comments (2)

  • Peter-Gay Eddy Reply

    Your blog Lisa was truly refreshing to read. Some timely reminders , but most importantly I don’t need to change in order to take a leap.
    Thank you for this!

    August 20, 2021 at 10:34 pm
    • bellabaci Reply

      Hi Peter-Gay. Thanks for taking the time to read! We are so glad that you enjoyed!

      August 22, 2021 at 10:13 am

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